Farewell Sara Palin, you left us in a fog.
Still, on one thing we all agree,
Be we friend, be we foe, you left us all agog.
Ann Coulter's such a backwards lass
Farts from her mouth; talks out her ass.
And here to introduce this poem is Ann Coulter. On the same day that Sarah Palin officially left office, Coulter said, "Palin trumps Obama in power and importance."
Sarah's Folly . . .
an ode(r) of media-oddity
What's with folksy Sarah Palin
And her latest ploy?
I suspect a language failing
Is the nexus of her story.
Listening to her it's evident
From all she has said
She relies on befuddlement
To spin her zen of tangled threads.
At a makeshift lectern standing
Friends and family,
Fast flown the fame that might have been.
I'm not quitting, she was saying
While she was quitting.
The governor's seat betraying,
The seat she can't stand for, sitting.
No, I will not be a lame duck,
She told a gaggle
Of honking geese with the lame luck
Into Lake Lucille to straggle.
Hunkering down is apathy,
Which governors know
Is what is wrong with a country
That lets dead fish flaot with the flow.
I'll protect wildlife, she avows,
Like life to support.
Except for polar bears. Or wolves
You can shoot from a plane for sport.
But ducks and geese and other fowl,
Dead salmon and carp,
Along with bears and wolves that howl,
Suggest motives more dull than sharp.
Said life's too short to compromise,
Though that's what she did
By thwarting voters with goodbyes.
I am tired of fighting, she said.
I am a fighter, she declared,
In another view.
I thrive on challenge, so beware:
If you make charges, I will sue.
Nor does she admit to defeat
To misattribute a retreat
To flight in the wrong direction.
Misdirection is befitting
The pulling out game.
Fight or not, quitting, not quitting,
Retreat, advance, it's all the same.
Palin left her party agape
Pulling out too soon.
Todd from A-I-P pulled out late;
Not soon enough Levi Johnston.
A(h)pathetic, it begs to say
No doubt borrowed from Tina Fey,
Has this word: Obituary.
Since Sarah inventing Sarah
Is for Sarah's sake
There is naught but illusion there,
The sad delusion she creates.
For when you quit a post of trust,
There's no second round.
All your whining now draws disgust.
You don't stand up by standing down.